woody & buzz

today... is a sad day.
today... i cried a lot.
today... i saw woody & buzz.
and that was sad... because woody & buzz were perched ever so carefully into a flower arrangement that greeted visitors who came into the funeral mass.
woody & buzz do not belong at a funeral.
but today, woody & buzz were there because this funeral was for a 2 year old little boy who was taken to heaven far too early.

this funeral changed me forever. i had never met the little boy. but i had been great friends with his mommy in high school. the pain and heart break this family is going through is beyond my comprehension. i simply can not stop thinking of them and praying for them.

i have kissed my little heads today way more than i normally do. i have stopped and smelled their smell. i played lego's longer. i hugged tighter. i got down in the sandbox. i stayed very calm while disciplining today. all because God has allowed me to be so lucky to do these things today.


today i learned that today we should be grateful for what we have. for tomorrow, it could be gone.

the priest today said to the grieving parents something to the effect of, that death of children is one of God's greatest mysteries. i felt relief to hear these words come from the priests mouth, as for the past several days, as i have processed this families overwhelming & unthinkable loss, i have struggled, as i pray for them, that i pray to a God that took this baby from them. it's confusing. but comforting all at the same time. i feel a tremendous sense of guilt that their tragedy has me counting my blessings.

today... stop. and count your blessings.
and pray for this family whose lives will never be the same.
pray they are comforted by happy memories and that God helps them through the process of grieving.